唔衰得既精神

下了倾盆大雨，

看着你，想着，

应帮你盖被。

想尝试把你的被盖好，

却害怕把你弄醒，

想拿起你身旁的寒衣，

却也被你压着。

关掉风扇，

也怕你不舒服，

想着想着，

就把自己的被给你盖上，

只有一个希望:

望莫着凉…

I am the winner?

I was the winner?

Or have I not won at all?

I don’t have any ability,

24 hours is still not enough for me, so don’t ask me if I have time…

With my income, I’d be happy if I can support my own ass

I had patience, I had determination,

But seems a little faded just moments ago…

Flashbacks don’t just occur on the moment you knew you would stop breathing.. Certain things just struck you as you go through your life e.g blog hopping…

What differences do I have than the rest? We’ve shared common names, we’re all lovable… The difference would be that I do more blog hopping from time to time…

It’s the 1st time I felt so regret of blog hopping… All those memories… They came alive and more imaginations of how things began wandering my mind.. I was alone, helpless, couldn’t control my thoughts… Maybe it’s good if someone can invent things which can purge bad memories… Scars persist but yet the pain would no longer be felt, at least I wouldn’t worry how my mind wanders without my control…

When you start to care, it’s when you start to become vulnerable.. Well some might have a different say bout this but my point is once you care, you will care… A tiny little threat could seem to break this strong yet fragile bond into pieces.. It’s not necessary a life-threatening scene, but a good show of watching how history repeats itself could be the worst nightmare.. Roles played might be different, but the contents of the show remain uncut with a little twists of how things work inside this show…

I don’t want to get trapped by former shadows.. They’re not me so they don’t act like me and vice versa.. I don’t contain what they contain and I am weak against the invisible targets.. In terms of weak moments where people will seek god(s)’s wisdom.. As rational as I am, I’m still open for miracles for the strength to carry on..

P/S.. Not sure what I’m writing too.. Readers don’t complain…

He Wins;
He possesses;

He has the ability,
He has the time,
He has the money,
and most importantly;
He has patience and determination…

Patience,
can break rocks,
can heal wounds,
can turn rods into needles, and
can melt even the coldest heart…

Determination,
can move a mountain,
can overcome physical capabilities,
can fly without wings, and
can go the distance…

Salute, Respect and Hail to the Winner~

Ne-Yo

[Intro]
Closer [x4]

[Verse 1]
Turn the lights off in this place
And she shines just like a star
And I swear I know her face
I just don’t know who you are
Turn the music up in here
I still hear her loud and clear
Like she’s right there in my ear
Telling me that she wants to own me
To control me
Come closer [x3]

[Chorus]
And I just can’t pull my self away
Under her spell I can’t break
I just can’t stop [x4]
And i just can’t bring myself no way
But I don’t want to escape
I just can’t stop [x4]

[Verse 2]
I can feel her on my skin
I can taste her on my tongue
She’s the sweetest taste of sin
The more I get the more I want
She wants to own me
Come closer
She says come closer

[Chorus]

Come Closer [x7]
I just can’t stop no [x4]

[Chorus]

And I just can’t pull myself away
Under her spell I can’t break
I just can’t stop [x5]

Come Closer

Just had a drinking session with several friends.. A little disappointed but I’m OK. I realised that we did not take any photos at all…. Initially I felt strange while fetching friends home, but after awhile I felt that I should not be, it’s never my hobby or interest to take photos on every gathering, much more when most of my friends will tend to hide from camera…

I’ve changed, without my consent, I’ve changed alot…
Once I hate cam-whoring, which made me felt like an idiot. Also I need a bigger scale of image to on my face alone… But now I’ve seen the importance of cam-whoring especially with friends doing stupid acts as this binds us together and create more laughter in the future when we look back at the photos.. It keeps good memories together as well as avoiding them from fading away…

I never dared to play with children.. I love children but I never intended to play with them… It’s a huge responsibility to play with them as I have no sense of control and might just hurt them with my strength. I may not have learnt to be more gentle when dealing with kids but certainly  I have the courage to start making fun of them and seeing their smiles would just brighten up my day. Now I start to play with kids whenever I see them rather than holding back myself, in the elevator, at my working place, in a queue or even sitting at a mamak.. It feels like an angel’s smile decended upon me to see children’s innocent smiles… I would like to smile like they do

Animals - love them but will never get one of them. It’s always nice to see pets belong to my friends and I would just look at them rather than having physical contact. That was then but now I’ll try my best to get a good touch of them to feel them. It sounds abstract but touching with animals will surely give me some thoughts of having one on my own.. However, this has never changed as raring pets aren’t as easy as what it seems. I don’t have the time for nor I have the mood for this.. But I’ve become bolder to start touching them to show the pets some love and the motto "I come in peace". Hopefully 1 day I will find one who will change my perception of raring pets and helping me to rare them.

(Preferably a female with lots of love hehe)

It’s been so long since I last blogged, think that I should modify the way I blog to update my blog more often…

Today I worked out harder than I normally do, cuz I knew that I was going to consume pork hehe… It the pork bought by Esty, a good fren of Cindy, right from Perak.. It’s gonna be a pork festival today, muahahaha

1st dish -  Roasted Pork.. Damn it’s really nice, the taste is
hardcore, damn tasty.. The fat part sticks to the thin part, the ratio and the size of the pork slices are just perfect, made it perfect and there would be no feeling of having too much. Below the plate got some BBQ pork also, though not much
left, still the taste of sweetness is unmatchable to the roasted
pork… OWNING

2nd dish - Siu Mai. I only ate 1 of it since there was not much left
when I wanted to eat. It was bought by Carien I think… If it’s her,
then I should thank her loh for buying for the first and one last time
before she leaves to U.S for her studies. Add the best to her though I
don’t really know her.. Only know that she’s part of the Djauw family
where they really can EAT…

3rd dish - Cucur Pisang and Cucur Ikan Bilis. I bought these on the way
going to car park after gym since Cindy told me that Esty would not
bring alot of pork down. So it’s sorta like back up food if I was still
hungry after finishing the pork. The cucur pisang was good, but the

ikan bilis was quite hard and the smell was quite strong. I give a
3.5/5 for them.

Last dish - Porridge. It might look plain but can u believe that
there’s pork inside? Well it’s not really pork, but it’s Esty actually
put in bones into the porridge to enhance the taste and smell of it..
Amazing eh? That’s why my mom said that every part of a pig is a
treasure, gotta believe old man’s saying…

As tasty as it sounds, I could not fill my stomach with the porridge after eating so much of PORK and drinking lots of water.. Hmm, I should ask Cindy if there is leftover tomorrow for the porridge keke…

In the end, my stomach was fully filled with pork, every inch of it… But guess what? I’m not the winner who ate the most.. It was our beloved Cindy, she almost finished the first box and she still could eat with me the second box of pork. Whenever she walks past that plate of pork, she wouldn’t be able to control herself and started chewing some pork.. Muahahah a good news cuz my bet of her becoming 75KG is one step closer… What a devil I am, muhahahaha

我不知道我的部落格有没有读者，可是对我来说，

这是发泄心情的最好地方..

不许顾虑到别人误解我，反正我都习惯被误解了..

靠文字来抒发，感觉比较实在，至少在往后的日子里，

自己可以回顾以前的事情，看看是否有所成长,

笑看以前的我..

今晚我完全无优的看了一出戏,

故事说的是星星与人..

当时真的被感动了，

好像这种事真的会发生..

所以我努力的撑着，撑着，

自己快要没能力撑下去了；

因为我懂，救我的人，

不会在此时出现..

我还是想努力的挣扎，

虽然放弃的念头不断的重复…

It’s been a while since I last updated my blog..
Dozens of things happened, but hardly any of them are sad news, which is why I’ve been lazy to blog, it’s not necessary to share all the happy things with everyone gua..

Just listened to Jacky Cheung’s song call 讲你知. It’s an old song I know, but when I listened back to the lyrics it just touched me. I do realise that many of those old songs were lost deep inside my memories waiting to be recalled. I’ve been listening back to quite a number of old songs recently too, both english and chinese.. Maybe it’s the aging process which keeps me holding back to the good old days, normally only older people will wander in the old memories aren’t they?

My dark circles are getting worse lately, due to waking up so darn early while sleeping only after 12am. They’re even worse than Robin’s mask I guess. Sleeping after 12am is normal for me as I’ll always go online when I reach home no matter what time I come back, the duration of chatting with friends would be longer if it’s early, so all in all, sleep after midnight… The reason for early wake up is not only for lectures, but also for some other reasons - for a promise, to wake up early (kinda regretting now).

Been trying hard to put more effort on my studies, just that it’s rather useless as last minute work a.k.a procrastinating is injected into my blood. Compare to last semester, there’s still improvement where I will still do homework before going to tutorials. But tomorrow I may die due to the replacement for Audit and I didn’t do the homework, sei lah…
The purpose of being so hardworking? Well last semester was a motivation for me to achieve even better result after getting a HD in my exam. Greed has overwhelmed me in a good way. Moreover, my plan 2 leave 4 Aus maybe obstructed if I don’t get better results within these 2 sems. In addition, it’s to prove of my main objective to go to Aus is to study, not for fooling around. The 唔衰得即精神 will remain in me Kin Fai has done his part to maintain this spirit. I shall not falter..

有时候, 善忘真好,
日子真的比较好混..
因为, 没有包袱,
也没有伤心,
让自己无忧无虑..

善忘,
不代表没有记忆,
只是在记忆的拼图里,
拼的是自己想要得画面,
伤心的,
早就抛诸脑后;
开心的,
则是记忆犹新,

我善忘了,
忘记了以前的心碎,
所带来的痛楚，
忘记了以前的教训,
所给的警惕，
重蹈复测,
伤痕累累的记忆,
好像曾经有过，
甚至忘了对自己与他人的承诺,
因为自律能力降了,
做了无可挽回的事情..

内疚吗? 不会..
因为我善忘..
承诺呢? 忘了..
因为我善忘..
怎么办?
记录起来噜..

过了今晚，
善忘的我，
可能依然就范，
撞个头破血流，
果真是个活该，
连三岁小孩都比我清醒，
看来我的善忘，
还让我活在自己的世界里.. 

今天过后,
生活会改变

多了一份思念,
多了一种病,
多了一份期待,
多了一份记忆,
多了一份忧虑,
多了- 不该多的…

少了短讯的来临,
少了一把声音,
少了一个背影,
少了支撑的力量,
少了一份关怀,
少了- 不该少的…